What is stopping you from getting the love that you want

     I posted this question on my facebook. "what is stopping you from getting the LOVE that you want?" Only two responded and their answers where there ego and pride. After much thought to the question, this is the answer that keep coming back to me. I am what is stopping me from getting the LOVE that I want. I have been in mommy mode for the last 27yrs, and expect for about 6 months of that last 22 years I have been single and celibate. My life consisted of working, taking a class here and there, basketball games, and just everyday life of running a household as a single mother. If I did anything else it was dinner, movies or out for drinks with my girls friends.
    I know some of you may think that I must have been in a bad relationship, I feel like I don't need a man, I am a man basher or I think there are no good men left.  So let me just set the record straight. My relationships were not abusive and I remained friends with the men. I do need a man not to make me feel like a whole woman but because I miss the company of a man. As for male bashing and no good men left I think that MEN, especially Black men, are the best thing God created this side of Heaven and there are still good ones out there.
     The desire for male companionship burst in the daylight about 2 months ago. I am enrolled in a program for displaced unemployed or under employed woman. Part of the programs was to concentrate on the things we want and what we need to make us feel healthy and whole. After several weeks of this planning my life stage, the feeling that there was something missing would not leave. Then I dreamed about AW and the missing piece was found.I knew I wasn't ready to be in a relationship but I missed just having a good conversation with a man. Hearing his point on a subject. Don't get me wrong I love my girls but there is just something different when talking to a man. 
      Am I afraid of failing, of course, but I am more afraid of not knowing what the hell I am doing and even more afraid not  trying to get involved with men on a friendly basis. I have let that part of me lay dormant for so long that it is like resurrecting the dead. The Problem is that I have been alone so long that I don't know how to allow someone else into my personal space. I am just unsure how to relate to a man on a one on one level. How long do you wait to give them your number? what questions to ask them without offending them? Should you do a criminal background check? Ask their HIV Status. I mean I could go on but I think you all get the picture.
     I have made the effort to open up and interact with a few men but it didn't go so well. The first one was simple minded, didn't have a clue about women or was just trying to play mind games. The second one he was rough for real and let me just state for the record I AM NOT ABOUT THAT LIFE. There is a level that I just can not do now. Maybe 10 years ago I could hung but not now. Now we come to gentleman 3 and I am running for the hills.  He can hold a great conversation, He seems interested in getting to know about me and what I like to do. Now I guess I just have to suck it up and let the chip fall where they may.